Cigarettes Helps you Relax?

I’ve helped a lot of people quit smoking. While doing this, I’ve been told a lot of reasons why it is good to smoke.

I’ve been told smoking sharpens your mind, relaxes you, calms you, keeps you from yelling at the kids (or spouse), tastes good with coffee, tastes better after a meal. In short, makes you feel “better”. (I always ask “better than what”?)

I know you don’t really believe these reasons, or why would you be trying to stop smoking. Still, a part of you DOES believe these reasons.

You do have a strong reason to keep smoking or you would have quit by now. Just so you know, there are not any laws stating your reason to keep smoking needs to make any sense. It rarely does.

In fact, 99% of the reasons you continue can easily be proven incorrect. Maybe smoking keeps you from blowing up and yelling at your spouse because you’re mouth is full of smoke, or even better, you have to go outside to smoke.

Most of the time you KNOW the reason doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t change the craving though, does it? Just one more one more reason in your list of reasons to quit. A list that doesn’t have much chance against the well-rooted cravings to smoke.

It all comes down to two things. The belief that smoking will make you feel better and what you’re trying to feel better than. That’s it.

If you’re hungry you feel like eating. If you’re tired, you feel like sleeping. If you feel bad (stressed, over-burdened, upset, alone, whatever…) you want to feel good. And, whatever your mind has learned feels good, you feel like doing.

This feeling to do something is what you probably call a craving. Many smokers have more than one type of craving going on. The ‘after you wake up’ craving might feel different than the ‘after a meal’ craving. The same principles apply.

So, what are you supposed to do? I can write several pages talking about this (and I have, look for them) But, it all comes down to modifying the feeling, motivation and belief involved.

First, feeling bad needs to be looked at and helped. If it’s stress, get it managed, if it’s a bad situation, do what you can to fix it or get help.

Second, the ‘looking to feel better’ side of things needs to be updated. (it’s common that this is about mistaken beliefs, formed when young, that smoking is about being an adult, in control, strong willed, independent, etc…) Of course, a cigarette is only leaf and chemicals wrapped in paper. The good feeling is the emotions your mind has attached to this action. It could just as easily be ice cream or cookies that your mind has attached good feelings with.

And there’s the trick for most people. Successfully quitting smoking is much easier after changing these emotional connections. People don’t often think of this. That is why the success rate of medication and nicotine replacement alone is so poor. The only current exception is Chantix and even Pfizer, the makers of Chantix, recommend behavior modification along with their medication.

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